Study Abroad Tales

“What’s Filter Coffee?” And Other Horror Stories 0.5

PDA

Until I was 13, I wasn’t allowed to watch movies with kissing scenes in them. So there was no MTV or Titanic in my life. In fact, even Tom and Jerry sometimes got cut short if Tom decided to get nasty with a girl cat.   

So I watched more Bollywood movies, where ‘lip-to-lip’ kissing was a disgusting act (at the time). Now I’ve watched a total of ten movies in my life so I may not be qualified to give you an insight into Indian cinema, but I can tell you what I’ve seen. I’ve watched close-ups of the actor kissing his lady’s ears, neck and eyelids till I threw up in my mouth. How this was better than one quick lip-to-lip I’ll never understand. 

I grew into an adult who was fascinated by couples openly kissing with no regard for their surroundings. It’s so sweet that two people can display their love for each other and the adults around them can remain conscious. But all this was until that one evening. 

I was on the subway and somehow found myself sandwiched between two unusually tall lovers. (There’s a very original and funny subway sandwich pun hidden in that sentence; look for it.) The train was crowded so I couldn’t get out of this sandwich. It wasn’t an issue for them though, they just went ahead and kissed repeatedly over my head.

The awkwardness of the situation and the unnecessary reminder of my height was just too much. Now I snarl at any two people sitting together – just in case.

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